Text from a while ago. 2015 I'd say. I didn't post it by then because I was afraid people would read it and I'd be ashamed. Stupid. Living is never ever anything of what to be ashamed.
Thank you girl, for insisting on me posting it. A bit late, but here it is.
Love, xoxo
Alessia Garnet
Probably, at that point of the night, I wasn't sure about almost anything in my life except that I wanted to live the moment and, at that precise momentum, I felt like everything was leading me towards her body so, with no more hesitation, I decided to let myself go. "Fuck it", I thought, I want to know how it feels. And I went for it. "Wait a second, I'll be back right now" I told her. And in her eyes something burnt immediately. And in mine, well, mine were already burning from the moment I made my decision. So there I was, walking next to this sweet Belgian lady along the streets of this magic, cute and tiny city of Brugge at 4am in the morning. Leading myself and my body to an experience I had never lived before and yet, if I had to be nervous, all I could feel was amusement and true expectance. So there we were, in her cute student room. She was lightning on some candles around the room and everything seemed to fall into place. There, I might have started to feel a little bit nervous but still, all I wanted to know is how the touch of her lips would feel on mine. How the touch of her hands would feel on my soul. I was going crazy by the only thought of all those forthcoming events. I wanted it to happen so badly but she seemed somehow reluctant to start the action. She was hoping not to force me, not to shock me but what she didn't understand is that something in me was terribly craving for her to make me go crazy as I had never been before. I was impatient but at the end, the timing was right and there she was, all over me, carefully kissing my lips. It felt soft, it felt great, it felt like something I had been waiting for. Then her hands started rushing along my body, impatient. As so did mine. I wanted to know how it felt to touch her. To kiss her neck and hear her sigh at the rhythm of my tongue, at the rhythm of my fingers, gently caressing her whole body. And that moment, when we were finally naked one aside the other, one upon the other, one above the other and only the skin was between us, everything felt like heaven and hell collapsing together. It felt smooth, it felt right, it felt warm and it made my blood boil. My breathing was surprisingly fast, she surely awoke something in me. I wanted her to revel in pleasure and I wanted her to make me scream at the same time. She kissed my neck, my breast, my nipples, she bit them and made me groan in pleasure but her trip wasn't still done so then she kept kissing, my ribs, my belly, my center hips and then, she was there. Downtown as she called it. Making me crazily suffer of delight, playing, pushing and kissing while making me moan and sigh and shout in my insights. She doesn't know but I stared at her and held her hair out of her face so I could see her blue eyes staring at me from down there and then she went on and I couldn't help but savor the moment and let my fantasies come true. I could explain and describe everything that happened but that would not be interesting at all. Just the way I felt when we were done: relaxed, comfortable, surprisingly satisfied and good. And also, that amazing feeling of giving her an orgasm. Just like a present. Something I was doing only for her. The words she would whisper amid her sighs, that was amazing. Hearing her voice broken because of the thrill and the compulsions of her body when I pressed harder or faster or when I bit her naughtily. I was glad for all of that sin. That was a terribly awesome sin that I would repeat a thousand times. That weird night on Brugge I would have never expected and yet, I would have always regretted to miss. However, I thought maybe I would feel weird when I woke up next to her, all naked, all smeared of those naughty things we did last night but instead, I wanted more and I asked for more and I utterly lived it all up. And I loved it, all of it. She made me feel something new, for sure, and that wouldn't be forgotten so easily. And that was a night I don't think is going to slip my mind any time soon. And there will she be, when I feel like sleeping is not worth and when my hands feel playful and her image will come to my mind and the game might start again.